Sunday, March 8, 2009

Re: Skinny Jeans

ALL of my jeans are now my "skinny jeans"

You know, the ones you can wear properly as soon as you lose those few extra pounds? Even my FAT jeans, the ones I could wear on the chubbiest, most PMS-ey of days, are now fitting quite snugly.

It always amuses/irritates me that the moment things start going well in one area, or two or three, another must go to crap. Like when God opens a door, he slams a window down on your fingers. I'm speaking of the economy, and the fact that I cannot seem to get a job. I understand I'm not the only one in this boat. I really do. But dammit, I will wallow in self pity, I will! It's just a matter of self-confidence. It's starting to make me question things. Things like, has every professional/academic decision I've ever made been the wrong one? Should I have gone with another major? Should I have gotten better grades and just gone straight to grad school? Can I really DO anything? Do I have any abilities at all, besides serving food and playing with children that will enable me to go anywhere?? I don't even know how to use EXCEL, for God's sake! I don't have any office experience, and I truly feel like I missed a page somewhere. And apparently I am trying to fill that page with ice cream and macaroni and cheese.

Today is my ex's birthday, and also his first wedding anniversary. It's my prom date's first anniversary. Strange, huh? Ah, life. For the first time in a long time, I can honestly say I am happy for him and wish him the very best, as he does for me. He deserves it. We both deserve it.

Anyway...The Britney concert is in less than a month! Excitement abounds! Till then, I'll let Brit herself be my inspiration. If she can have two children, be married to K-Fed, have a meltdown and STILL bounce back and get into shape, so can I. Right? RIGHT?

5 comments:

♥ Kathy said...

Right :) My sister loves Brit too lol and don't stress too bad about the job situation. I mean, don't become a couch potato or anything ;) LOL but yeah, cut yourself some slack. Times are tough all over sweetie. Something will happen for you, I just know it :D

And hey, taking care of kids and cooking aren't jobs to scoff at. I raised three kids working in restaurants and on my good checks I could bring home between 1500 and 2000 every two weeks. It's not a fortune but it ain't chump change either ;) I think that's part of the secret: Be willing to do anything but be happy about doing it. It took me years to figure that out hahaha true story

(sorry about the book :D)

Jess said...

Don't ever apologize about the book, I do the same thing! And I know, I do love kids and I know restaurants definitely pay the bills, I'm just ready for something different, too, you know? And no, couch potato-ing is generally only a weekend activity, although when I watch Ella it's part of the fun =)

jon and nichole said...

ella does give you some-what of a work out -- her constant attention depletes my energy with the quickness..and i hate it...

i know you will find a job - seriously - dont worry, k? and for gods sake, i dont know how to use excel, and im a freaking engineer...you just gotta take it one day at a time...you made the right decisions...and dont get discouraged...you are an amazing person and thats ultimately all that matters...you can look in the mirror and know that you have made all the decisions that were best for you at that time...and thats all that anyone can ask for, right?

Thomas said...

When is the Britney concert?

Jess said...

The Britney Show is on April 9!!