Thursday, January 28, 2010

Remember the (other) time the world was ending?

There is nothing to remind you of how painful a breakup can be until someone you care about is going through it. So very true.

Especially when they're going through it with your ex, and it is, nearly exaclty, the same experience you had. Same script, different cast.

It is amazing the way God twists our lives around...If you want to hear God laugh, tell him your plans. Just when I think I have things figured out, I'm thrown for a loop. And it's incredible.

This is a story about a girl named Lucky...yeah, Britney fans, you know it. Lucky is not her real name, as I am keeping it out to protect her privacy, but I chose Lucky as her nickname because whether she fully realizes it yet or not, she is.

Lucky was the girl, after the last particularly rough breakup, who dated The Ex. She was the one I obsessed about, stalked on Facebook, was convinced wasn't right for him. Turns out, I was right. They broke up. I called it, saw it coming, blah, blah, blah. Not because I wished heartbreak on her, but because I had seen the story unfold before. I just knew. Anyway, long story short, this fantastic woman sends me a message on the all-powerful Facebook, and before I know it, we're meeting for drinks.

Okay, we're meeting for SEVERAL drinks. And you guys, she's phenomenal. And as we talked, I realized two things: 1) We are scary similar in the way we think, act, choose to live our lives, and 2) We were both conned into loving someone that was, quite simply, toxic (score 2 for Britney) for us. Hearing her story and telling her mine and finding they were more or less the same, to put it midly, irritated me. How dare he? It legitimatley pissed me off. I found it so unfair that after him, I took the time to heal, stayed single, and then found somebody great, who was good for me. I don't know what the future holds for my current relationship, but I know that it isn't doomed for failure right off the bat. And what did he do after me? Waited three days, and then got together with someone equally not right for him and pulled the same wool over her eyes as mine? Watched another great person fall in love with him, only to assert in the end that things would just never work out. Made another big huge effing mess. I would have remained understanding, even empathetic towards him if he had chosen to learn from his mistake with me. If he had seen the damage he'd done and made the necessary changes to ensure it wouldn't happen again, I might be able to get over it now. I don't hate him. I've even forgiven him. But I just can't understand.

Here's where Lucky's story (and mine) has a happy ending. She came into my life when, and ONLY when, I was ready to see my relationship with him for what it was (and wasn't). I am healed and happy...I left the bar last night and came back to a wonderful guy who had a bottle of water and a goodnight kiss waiting for me, two things he knew I'd be needing. I was so grateful to have pulled through and to be able to be there for someone else. Things have come full circle in the most incredible way, and I couldn't be more thankful to know this woman and call her my friend.

Here comes the sun, little darlin'...


bella beautiful said...

I heart you... and now I have the song Lucky stuck in my head.. I had a choice.. Lucky or Toxic... Toxic never even came to mind.. Lucky..Very Lucky Indeed...

Jess said...

I heart YOU...Nobody saw the toxic part coming, but lucky is better!